Since the last newsletter His Holiness Tamal Krishna Goswami Maharaja left England and visited Dallas once to associate with his dear disciple Kirtida devi dasi when the doctors expected that she would leave her body within days, and then again a few weeks later at the time of his Vyasa-puja celebration. Upon returning to England he attended the London Ratha-yatra on Sunday, June 24th. This newsletter will briefly describe the Vyasa-puja and the auspicious passing of Mother Kirtida, which took place on Wednesday, June 20, 2001. In the next newsletter we will describe Srila Gurudeva’s participation in the London Ratha-yatra and we will also try to get a report on Nama Acarya Prabhu, a wonderful disciple of Gurudeva’s in China who recently left his body as well.

Krishna willing, in late July and early August Srila Gurudeva will visit Hong Kong, Taiwan and the Phillipines. Srila Gurudeva plans to celebrate Sri Krishna Janmastami and Srila Prabhupada’s Vyasa-puja at New Vraja Dhama, Hungary, from August 10^th-14^th along with H.H. Sivarama Swami, H.H. Radhanath Swami, H.H. Niranjana Swami, H.H. Giridhari Swami, H.H Bhakti Vidyapurna Maharaja, Mother Malati Prabhu, H.G. Kesava Bharati Prabhu, many devotees and a few of his European disciples.

On the day of the Vyasa Puja Srila Gurudeva began by offering flower garlands to all the assembled Srila Prabhupada disciples in the audience and he presented them with gifts. They included Mahatma Prabhu, the well-known kirtan recording artist; Mother Kulangana Prabhu, a saintly senior devotee who had come from Bhaktivedanta Manor to be with Kirtida; Sankarsana Prabhu, now an ISKCON guru who preaches in Austin, Texas (with his wife Visnu Priya, who is a disciple of Gurudeva and originally from Fiji); Mother Rasajna, a longtime devotee who served Srila Prabhupada in the Vaikuntha Players transcendental acting troupe at the 55^th Street temple in New York; Caitanya Candra Prabhu, Durasaya Prabhu, Jivananda Prabhu, Sri Raga Prabhu, Jitavrata Prabhu and Misra Bhagavan Prabhu, all residing in Dallas, and Rasamrta Prabhu from Houston, Mother Jaya Lalita from Corpus Christi, as well as several others.

Many disciples of Srila Gurudeva from Dallas and the nearby Houston temple attended the celebration. However, due to torrential rain storms and flooding in Houston, some devotees there could not make the three and a half hour drive to Dallas because many roads were closed and thousands of cars became stuck and filled with water. At times the Houston airports were closed and most roads to the airports were inaccessible as well. Other devotees, however, were able to come from distant places: from England came Manikundala dasi and her husband and three children as well as Syamala Sakhi dasi. Guru Vratini dasi and her husband came from Germany. Bhaktin Joyce had come from Holland to be with Kirtida and also was able to attend the Vyasa-puja. Prema Mayi dasi came from Sweden. Visaka Priya dasi from Hong Kong had come earlier and she was later joined by Padma dasi of the China mission as well. Padma was not present for Vyasa-puja but stayed for Kirtida’s final days. Balakrishna dasa had come from Singapore along with his family; and the sisters Saibya dasi and Urjesvari dasi, who had already come from Singapore to be with Kirtida, were on hand for the Vyasa-puja celebration as well. From the Los Angeles temple arrived Gurudeva’s dynamic Philippine duo of Balarama dasa and Advaita dasa. Advaita, a talented kirtan leader, led the mangala arati and Vyasa-puja kirtans with great enthusiasm and devotion. From New York came Yasomati Nandana dasa and a nice bhakta, as well as Jaya Subhadra dasi and her husband. From Florida Radha Gopinath dasa and his wife Tapasvini had come, from Michigan Prema Bhakti dasa arrived and Kaustubha dasa from Boston. Srila Gurudeva’s mother visited from California and his brother Carl and his wife Stella and their children had come down from Iowa. This covers many of the visiting devotees, but we apologize if we’ve left some names out.

Perhaps the most unique attendee of the Vyasa-puja celebration was Mother Kirtida herself, whose hospital-style bed was set up right in the temple room so she could see both Srila Gurudeva and Sri Sri Radha Kalachandji. At this point she had not eaten solid food for about nine weeks, subsisting only on coconut water or water alone. She was very thin like a yogi, but quite effulgent and with perfect clarity of mind.

Srila Gurudeva’s talk briefly explained that Vyasa-puja is a day of honoring the representative of Vyasadeva in the disciplic succession. But rather than speaking of himself he immediately explained that he was not the only representative of Vyasa, even in Dallas. Rather, he explained, there are devotees present in the Dallas community for whom at least twenty-five spiritual masters have provided guidance, past and present. Gurudeva then began glorifying spiritual masters, including H.H. Bhakti Caru Swami, H.H. Radhanath Swami, H.H. Niranjana Swami, H.H. Jayapataka Swami, H.H. Satsvarupa dasa Goswami, H.H. Hrdayananda dasa Goswami, H.H. Trivikrama Swami, H.H. Rtadvaja Swami, H. H. Dhanudar Swami , H.H. Giriraja Swami, H.H. Giridhari Swami and many others. He also glorified ISKCON gurus who had fallen away, but prior to that had done wonderful preaching and performed a lot of austerity and devotional service. A number of these gurus helped inspire devotees who now live in the vicinity of the Dallas community. Srila Gurudeva also glorified a prominent senior spiritual master in the Gaudiya Math who is the guru of Guru Vratini’s husband Ekanath dasa, who was also attending the festival. All in all it was a wonderful talk which inspired not only his own disciples but all those who were present.

Then a number of devotees spoke, glorifying their spiritual master. While many made offerings, Kirtida’s was most noteworthy, not only for what she said but for the circumstances as well. It was clear that this would be her last Vyasa-puja offering, yet Kirtida was calm and not overwhelmed by undue sentimentality. Rather, she spoke with great clarity, dignity and conviction. She spoke about fifteen minutes and described her whole life, how she had come to Krishna consciousness, and how she had developed faith and devotion to serve Srila Gurudeva as the way to best please Krishna. Previously she had almost died several times, but many devotees thought that because she had strongly desired to see Srila Gurudeva’s Vyasa-puja celebration before leaving her body, this was why Krishna allowed her to remain so long. A few devotees who were not disciples of Srila Gurudeva also spoke nicely, including Rohini Kumar dasa, a disciple of H.G. Prithu Prabhu and Seva Priya dasi, a disciple of H.H. Dhanudar Swami.

Guru puja ensued, during which Advaita dasa chanted the Guruvaskta prayers and led another ecstatic kirtan. At a certain point Padaduli Mataji wheeled Kirtida to the Vyasana where Srila Gurudeva was sitting. Along with her sister Mummitha, Kirtida, in her very weakened state, got out of the wheelchair, offered a garland and then made prostrated obeisances to Srila Gurudeva. Near the Vyasana Vishnu Priya devi had placed Their Lordships Sri Sri Radha Damodara, the tiny Deities which Gurudeva worshipped and traveled with for years. Kirtida gazed for a long time and with much devotion at these wonderful Deities, which are now cared for by Visnhnu Priya and her husband Sankarshan at their temple in Austin, Texas. Kirtida was fond of these Deities as she often got their darshan when she first was coming to Krishna consciousness.

The Dallas devotees, led by Manjuali dasi, the wife of temple president Nityananda and also assisted by Prabhupada disciple and stalwart Durasaya Prabhu, had prepared a sumptuous Vyasa-puja feast that was served thereafter in the upstairs hall. Later that evening, the program continued with gifts being presented to Srila Gurudeva. The entire event was very sweet and intimate. Srila Gurudeva spent much time meeting with nearly each guest after the feast and during the ice cream party in the evening. Many devotees commented how touched they were to hear Srila Gurudeva speaking from his heart and soul his inner feelings regarding the difficulties he has often experienced in recent years in his academic service. He explained how eager he is to be able to once again spend time in Sri Vrndavan dhama and to travel and preach as soon as his studies end.

Many visiting devotees left Dallas at this point and returned to their home areas.

During this period, however, a number of devotees who had come for Vyasa-puja were able to extend their stays to associate with Mother Kirtida, since everyone knew she could depart at any time. H.H. Giriraja Maharaja sent his dear disciple Manjari devi dasi , a longtime friend of Mother Kirtida from Vrndavan, to associate with Mother Kirtida in her final days. Kirtida’s dear sister Mummitha from Canada, and her brother ‘Kogie’ from South Africa both several times extended their plane reservations to stay on longer. They each chanted along with the devotees and appreciated the special spiritual atmosphere surrounding Kirtida. Hladini Sakti and Man Mohini dasi from Arkansas put off going back to work and finishing her Ph.D. dissertation, respectively, and stayed on longer. They stayed up late many nights chanting or helping any way they could. Many other devotees extended their stays as well.

Srila Gurudeva himself was supposed to attend an out-of-town conference and leave Dallas on Thursday, June14th, but he canceled going and stayed on to be with Kirtida. Every day he would come many times to see her in her room at Rasikendra and Padaduli’s house, which was right across the street from Sri Sri Radha Kalachandji’s temple and had been transformed into a Vrndavan atmosphere. Gurudeva would sing sweet kirtans, read Krishna Lila to Kirtida, or just speak with her or comfort her. He would also come in the morning and do japa while she slept.

The room was filled with the presence of Kirtida, Srila Gurudeva, the resounding Holy Name and the energies of many devotees and there was a beautiful altar with many Shaligram silas, Deities of Gaura Nitai, Radha-Krishna, sila of Giriraja Govardhan, many pictures of Vrndavan scenes and nice flower arrangements.

Throughout this period Rasikendra Prabhu and Mother Padaduli were gracious hosts, not only of Kirtida, but of the many devotees and droppers-in for weeks on end. Padaduli would make sure the house was cleaned each day at an hour when not many visitors were there. She also made sure prasadam was available for many devotees each day, take phone calls, watch Kirtida, worship Giriraja Govardhan on the altar, and many others duties. Rasikendra would be on hand to help in any way as much as possible, and he would often chant at times when no one else was available. He would have to leave the house, however, to attend simultaneously to his activities of teaching and studying towards his graduate degree at the university. The sisters Saibya and Urjesvari were constant assistants to Rasikendra and Padaduli, sharing the joys and austerities of the situation.

Gurubhakti dasi flew often from her medical practice in Houston to Dallas, attended to Kirtida, usually stayed up most of the night, and then flew back to Houston in the morning for a full day at her doctor’s office. That was when Kirtida was stronger. When Kirtida looked like she might leave her body Gurubhakti stayed in Dallas for days on end, and missed going to her office. Previously she had taken off a week and flown to London when Kirtida had cancer surgery a few months earlier.

Mother Candravali arranged a schedule of chanting around the clock, and different Dallas devotees chanted at all hours of the day and night. Before the schedule started, however, Urjesvata Prabhu came and chanted very often for Kirtida with his wife Gitamrta, then he went to Puerto Rico, however, before the Vyasa-puja. Mahatma Prabhu regularly chanted in the afternoons, and Sri Raga Prabhu and his daughter and others chanted late in the evenings, as would Saligram dasa. Caitanya Candra Prabhu would chant frequently at various times, and his wife Nila Madhava dasi would chant, often at other times. Indranila Mani would come regularly in the daytime and chant sweetly as well. Nrsimhananda Prabhu and his wife Varuni chanted beautifully every morning at around 4 a.m. Gopi Priya dasi would chant late at night for a couple of hours beginning around midnight until 2 or 3 a.m. She was frequently joined by Hladini Sakti and his wife Man Mohini dasi. Nityananda Prabhu would chant at around 3 a.m. Durasaya Prabhu would also chant very late at night; in fact on the morning Kirtida finally left her body he was still chanting at 3 a.m. with Mother Candravali. Garuda Prabhu, a talented musician and singer, led some very nice kirtans and he allowed his small Gaura Nitai Deities to be on the altar in Kirtida’s room. Misra Bhagavan Prabhu would often chant or play mrdanga expertly. Jai Balarama Prabhu, a disciple of H.G. Prithu Prabhu, placed many of his silas on the altar and he would frequently chant as well. Rohini Kumar dasa, also a disciple of Prithu Prabhu, would chant devotedly and was accompanied by his wife Vaisnavi. Vaisnavi would come other times and lead the chanting or play the mrdanga very nicely. The chanting during the main parts of the day was generally covered by the Dallas devotees and at other times visiting devotees like Caitanya dasa, Radha Krishna dasa brahmacari, Mahahari dasa or Jaya Baladeva dasa from Houston, Kaustubha dasa, Sarvabhauma dasa and others would chant as well.

Another devotee whose chanting pleased Kirtida very much at this time was Radhika Desai, a college student living near Dallas who has been a devotee of Krishna her entire life, as her parents met Prabhupada and later received initiation. Her father Atmarama Prabhu runs a Krishna conscious school in Gujarat with about 250 students and Radhika spent some time in her youth in Varsana and Vrndavan. Although busy with school examinations and also her job, in the final weeks of Kirtida’s life Radhika came as much as she could. One night when the doctors thought Kirtida would leave her body, Radhika chanted all night long, but Kirtida then got better again. Srila Gurudeva particularly enjoyed her singing, which has a Vraja mood and flavor. Kirtida, in fact, told Radhika that ideally she should be chanting at the time she left her body. But after chanting all that night, Radhika’s throat got strained and she lost her voice for a few days. However soon after this, perhaps the next night, her sister Bhakti devi, a disciple of H.H. Radhanath Swami, came and assisted with the lead singing. Radhika would begin the tune and play the harmonium, but Bhakti devi would do most of the singing, which took the strain off Radhika’s voice. Other times, when Bhakti wasn’t able to be there, Radhika got Chandravali, who has a very nice singing voice, to sing the parts. Very often Gurunistha dasi from Houston, an excellent mrdanga player, would play the drum when Radhika chanted and sometime she too would sing when Radhika’s voice would need a rest. In this way gradually her singing voice came back in the next few days. What is impressive is that to chant for Kirtida and to be with her so many devotees made sacrifices. This all contributed to the sweet spiritual atmosphere, and it went on for weeks.

Not only did devotees and family members visit Kirtida, but several nurses living in the Dallas area who had worked with her in local hospitals over the years, and who in some cases even knew her from South Africa, dropped in. Frequently her old friends Sarah Govender and Kay Mudely came to the house in their hospital attire either before or after work, or on off-days. Kirtida told Sarah calmly, "My work is done here and now it’s time for me to go to a better place." Although anyone in Kirtida’s position might say such a thing, her words had real conviction because of the kind of person she was, and the kind of life she had lived. As a devotee and for many years prior to being a devotee, Kirtida was industrious, upright, courteous, considerate, compassionate, meticulous and self-sufficient. She had always thought more for the welfare of others than herself. Her own ambitions and material plans were always secondary. Her life, unlike most, was not cluttered with indecision, regrets, debts, half-completed schemes or mental fluctuations. When she said her work was finished in this world and that she had no material desires, one sensed it was actually true. One could clearly observe that in her physical demise she was nonetheless spiritually ecstatic. In this sense, it became apparent that she was not a normal person.

One day, stationed by her bed, Srila Gurudeva asked Kirtida, "How is it that in your condition you are feeling so blissful?" Kirtida answered immediately that now, because Krishna had put her in the position where she would soon lose her body, she had no hope whatsoever to fulfill material desires. Rather, she found herself surrounded by her guru and the Vaisnavas, as well as by the Deities and Govardhan, and the constant chanting of the Holy Name—and so she felt simply happier and more ecstatic than ever before. She had nothing to take shelter of besides Srila Gurudeva and Krishna. That, she said, is why she felt so ecstatic.

During this period Kirtida would catch the eyes of whoever came into the room and open her arms. She would embrace that person with genuine love. To revel in love for Krishna, love for her guru and love for the Vaisnavas seemed her only business now. When a devotee would chant some kirtan or bhajan for her, whether it had been particularly melodious or not, Kirtida would express her heartfelt gratitude to that devotee for chanting the Holy Names. And after the Vyasa-puja Kirtida only began taking little pieces of ice. She was taking nothing, no material nutriment, but seemed to be living on spiritual energy and love alone. She was taking nothing in but giving so much to others.

One frequent visitor was little Kalindi, the daughter of Yudhisthira and Renuka, who live nearby on the same street, Gurley Avenue. In recent months a strange affliction had come upon Kalindi which weakened her body and made her bedridden. Her concerned parents took her to many doctors and experts but none could solve the riddle and cure her. Kalindi would often be placed in the bed with Kirtida and the two would enjoy each other’s company. Although she couldn’t give Kalindi physical health, Kirtida gave her love and Krishna conscious friendship, which Kalindi and her parents appreciated so much. Many other devotee children and teenagers came frequently to see Kirtida as well, sometimes with their parents, and sometimes on their own. These included Sri Raga’s daughter Radhika, Lilavati’s daughter Radhika, Gayatri, Narayan, Sesa, Mukunda, Kaliya, Syamali, Surata Rangini and Bhakti dasi’s little son Vasudeva, who was very ecstatic. The little boy would offer his obeisances to the Deities and Srila Gurudeva and even shook hands with Gurudeva. During the kirtans he would raise his hands and try to dance, sometimes stumbling a bit since he was so small. He would come toward the harmonium or kartals, so his father Sheetal Kumar Desai would have to grab him from time to time.

Every day Kirtida’s godsister Vrndavan Bihari dasi, who cared for her in Vrndavan years earlier, would come and sprinkle a few drops of Radha Kunda water in her mouth.

In her last weeks Mother Kirtida received many phone calls from devotees, family and friends. She got calls from Sivaram Maharaja and Giriraja Swami in the last few days before she departed, and also she spoke with Rtadvaja Maharaja, the elderly Mahavishnu Swami, Giridhari Swami, Bhurijan Prabhu and devotees from New Zealand, Australia, Holland, England and many other places. She even got calls from devotees who had left Krishna consciousness or had strayed from following strictly, but still were inspired by her and still held her as a friend. Everyone sensed she was their well wisher.

It went on like this for days and days. Sometimes the doctors thought she would leave her body very soon, and at such times more devotees would stay up all night or for very late chanting. But then a little more strength would come back to Kirtida and she would be blissful again. This went on in different phases and after a while the uncertainty began to be somewhat perplexing for many of the devotees, who had jobs and various responsibilities that they had been neglecting to a greater or lesser extent. It was uncomfortable to sit on the hard floor in the tiny room for long hours (the floor slanted sharply and was thus even harder to sit on). And it was difficult living on such patchy, irregular sleep, but the devotees experienced that the loving atmosphere emanating from Kirtida, Gurudeva and the devotees actually increased through all these ordeals. And just as the holy dhama of Vrndavan always has some austerities and discomforts but simultaneously spiritual rewards, so too did this house now.

Somehow, by Krishna’s arrangement, Kirtida’s passing was bringing the devotees closer together. In fact during her last couple days a group of devotees came up from Houston, which included some devotees who had missed Vyasa-puja due to the rains. They were able to finally come and participate in her passing and see Srila Gurudeva, but had she left her body a week earlier they would not have been able to have her association in the same way. So it seemed that Krishna was arranging everything for and through Kirtida throughout this period.

One night a couple of days before she left her body a wonderful kirtan was going on, and all the devotees in the room stood up (usually they were sitting down and chanting) and started dancing ecstatically. There was 15 or 20 devotees dancing in complete ecstacy and the bliss was so thick it was unbelievable. Not a single person seemed capable of escaping that ecstacy—it was like a tidal wave. At this time Kirtida was raising her arms and swaying in her bed to and fro. At that moment it became clearer than ever that this was a very precious and special time for everyone. This was not merely a grim ending but it was a spiritual happening.

One day after Kirtida and Srila Gurudeva spoke, Bhaktin Joyce from Holland, who was not in the room at the moment, was called for. Joyce’s husband Gaurasundar is a disciple of Gurudeva, and when the family visited Vrndavan years earlier Kirtida showed them around the holy places and took care of them, as she did for many visiting devotees. Kirtida had always been a special person in Krishna consciousness for Joyce. Gurudeva told Joyce that by the mercy of Kirtida he was going to initiate her. Soon Gurudeva initiated her, giving her the name Jatila. He also initiated the Dallas devotee Rekha on this same day.

One morning, the day after some devotees from Houston arrived, Janaka Maharaja dasa, the elderly father of Caitanya dasa, the head pujari of Houston, was in Kirtida’s room with Gurudeva and many devotees. Janaka Maharaja was sitting in one of the few chairs in the room, sort of leaning back. Suddenly he fell unconscious and the devotees lay him on the floor. Srila Gurudeva, already primed to assist Kirtida when she left her body, quickly attended to Janaka Maharaja with the speed of a paramedic. Gurubhakti, the devotee-doctor also from Houston, felt the pulse and momentarily there was nothing, so a devotee phoned the emergency phone number. Within about three minutes an ambulance and several other vehicles arrived. Some devotees in the temple rushed to the house thinking something had happened with Kirtida. Fortunately, however, Janaka Maharaja had only fainted in the hot stuffy room. It was another vivid reminder to all the devotees present, however, of the fragile nature of life in this material world, which has been compared by the acharyas to a drop of water hanging on a leaf.

The following is a press release sent out which briefly describes Kirtida’s passing from her body:

Thus ends this newsletter – Hare Krishna